5 Simple Ways Moms Can Practice Self-Love Everyday | Guest Post by Andi of Beets & Okra | Redefining Self-Love Series

Before I was a mom, self love was easier. That doesn’t mean I was always good at it, in fact, I had a pretty bad habit of putting myself down and finding ALL of my flaws. Not very loving, huh? Things have changed tremendously for me since I became a mom. I may even go as far as to say that I am better at loving myself now than I ever was before. Why? Time is precious and I want to make sure to fit it in because I know practicing self-love is crucial.

From the moment I found out I was pregnant, I learned that my life was no longer my private business. Anyone and everyone thought it appropriate to comment on everything from my size to my food choices. Before I had good sense about it, I felt a little beat down by all those external expectations. At that moment, I promised that I would love and nurture me! How do I do it? I strive to practice these five principles. 

Here are 5 Ways Moms Can Practice Self-Love Everyday.

1. Be confident that YOU know best.

Doubting that parenting decision? Don’t. I might not always feel confident in my parenting decisions but acting confident seems to make life a little easier. For me, this is a ‘fake it ’til I make it’ principle. We all know that every person on this planet has advice on how to raise kids. Thank you lady in the grocery store line for telling me my baby is clearly cold. I really appreciate it! NOT. Just because someone has different ideas does not mean that you are doing anything wrong. My baby happens to be hot natured and he doesn't need to wear socks every time we leave the house. Thank you very much!

Moms have an incredible instinct when it comes to their kids and should feel confident about that.

When that nice lady pipes up with her advice, just smile and nod, knowing that you have made the right decision for you and your family. Mama knows best!



2. Love and accept you for YOU.

“I should have or could have or should be or could be.” NOPE, don’t do it. Stop the judgment and criticism. Loving yourself means loving ALL of you, especially the imperfectly perfect parts! Stop judging every decision you make or every flaw that you see and start living. We are our harshest critics but it isn't productive and we end up just feeling guilty and worthless.

Let go of all the criticism and expectations, just enjoy being a mom.

Trust me, you aren't alone. Just last week, we had company and I noticed that some of my panties were on the couch in a pile of clean clothes. Oh well. Hello world, I wear panties and I haven’t had time to put them away. Sorry, you will have to deal. 

Related Article: "Make some time for you & attend an art class. I have taken several online and gone to some in person, and now teach art classes so I can share the benefits w/ others." [...] 5 Ways To Practice Self-Love With Art | L I N K » http://bit.ly/1fPqzTA

3. Let go for YOU.

Wouldn't it be nice if things were just how you wanted them? Let’s face it, that’s probably not gonna happen all the time so you might as well accept those things you can’t change and move on! In our house, we have a baby that has severe re-flux. I don’t mean he spits up some. I mean, all day every day on any and all surfaces, dogs, toys, mom, dad, bed sheets, and clothes are covered in half digested breast milk and pureed foods. We can’t change it, trust me, we have tried. I completely changed my diet, I have fed the boy probiotics since week one, I have rubbed him head to toe in every concoction known to man. Nothing works! The doctor says he will grow out of it. We accept it as it is and move on. Maybe you have to accept that your toddler wants to dress herself in a princess costume EVERY DAY for school or that all of your house plants died because you forgot they needed water to thrive. It’s okay!

Let it go and accept that this is the way things are for now.

Image courtesy of Beets & Okra

In time, your life will probably come back to a more “normal,” less chaotic place, but I bet you a zillion dollars that you will miss the days full of slobbery kisses, half digested food on every surface, and sticky hands touching everything. I know I will!

4. Know when YOU need to to say no.

I know you want to be super mom but if you’re feeling exhausted, like you have been run ragged. Look at what can be changed. Maybe all you need to learn is how to say NO!

You don’t have to do it all. Here is your permission to do what you can and no more.

For me, this meant leaving my job. I realize a lot of moms don’t have this option but it was the only way that I could have the time and energy to spend on my family. Maybe for you this means skipping out on an out-of-town event or locking yourself in your house for an entire weekend so you can stay in your PJs without brushing your hair or your teeth. It’s fine! SLOW DOWN and feel confident that by not over-committing, you are doing a great service to yourself and your family.



5. Find time for the things YOU love!

Let go of the guilt and breathe, hand the kids over to your husband, and lock the bathroom door. Fill up the tub with warm water, crank up some music, and R E L A X. It’s okay. He can handle it, I swear, and he may even appreciate you more when you emerge from your “you time.”

You can only care for your family if you are feeling well yourself. Think about what you need to be whole and well.

For me, it’s a hot bath with the aroma of lavender filling the air, a massage, wholesome food, and finding time to create things. Whatever it is… DO IT. Don’t put it off. You deserve an hour to yourself every now and then so indulge!

Just Remember: Moms, you are doing a great job! Keep it up. We need you, we love you, and we support you! Make sure you return the favor to yourself. You are perfect just as you are!

How do you plan to practice self-love today and beyond?! 

We’d love to hear your takeaways and observations in the comments!

Beets and Okra is a blog created by a DIY crazed mom who loves to be creative. I am Andi and I live in western North Carolina with my husband, baby boy, and two silly dogs. I love to spend my time cooking, mixing up beauty ‘concoctions’, designing party decor, cards, and invitations. I have a bizarre obsession with coconut oil and essential oils. My blog is for those of us who just like to give things a whirl and let that creative side open up! If you are looking for creative outlets or ways to pamper yourself, head over to beetsandokra.com for all things DIY.

To be notified when new Redefining Self-Love posts are available, sign-up for updates from Wayfaring Wanderer HERE and “LIKE” the Wayfaring Wanderer Facebook page to get connected! Interested in writing a guest post for the Redefining Self-Love Series? Shoot me an email with your ideas on ways to practice self-love at wayfaringwanderer[at]gmail[dot]com!

{ RELATED LINKS }

» 5 Ways To Practice Self-Love (Part 1) & 5 Ways To Practice Self-Love (Part 2)

» Food As Love: 5 Ways to Love Yourself w/ Food (Guest Post)

» 5 Ways To Practice Self-Love with Art (Guest Post)

5 Ways to Practice Self-Love with Art | Guest Post by Katie of KR Creative | Redefining Self-Love Series

I have had a love for art all of my life, especially in high school. My high school art teacher suggested graphic design to me as a career option and it was a perfect fit! I took a few years off after high school and then I did finally go to college for graphic design… just like I had planned. Studies of fine art go hand in hand with graphic design, so I got the opportunity to learn some different mediums in college as well. It wasn’t until Christmas about 4-5 years ago that I received the best gift ever. My husband bought me an easel, paints, brushes, and canvases. He wanted to see me get back into creating with paint. From then on, fine art has also played a major role in my life.

Yes, it’s true, art is a way of practicing self-love. It has been a major stress-reliever for me in the past several years since that Christmas day. I started painting, learning different techniques such as oil painting, watercolor painting, acrylic painting, and my favorite… mixed media art. I can’t get enough! There are online classes and workshops, video tutorials, books, and an online world of creative people to connect with on Instagram and other social media sites. I have connected and shared art with many people that way. I even teach art classes at my own little shop now. Dream. Come. True.

“Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.” 

- Pablo Picasso

Here are "5 Ways To Practice Self-Love With Art" just like I do!

1. Art Journaling - This is a wonderful way to take some time for yourself and get out what’s inside your head or write down some encouraging words or quotes for yourself. A lot of people use a moleskine journal or 110 lb cardstock and 80 lb mixed media paper to create in because of the thickness of the paper which will withstand the layering of paints, inks, collage, etc. Create a background first (so relaxing), and then collage with papers, magazine cutouts, or just doodle on the pages. Write positive messages to yourself, inspiring quotes, or journal.

2. Attend an Art Class - Make some time for you & attend an art class. I have taken several online art classes and gone to some in person. I now teach art classes so I can share the benefits of creating art with others. Even teaching art classes is a way of practicing self-love for me. Sharing art with others & seeing how excited they are about it makes me feel great. Find my class schedule here www.krcreativedesigns.com/eventschedule

3. Making & Trading ATCs  - I discovered what an ATC (artist trading cards) was a few years ago and have been creating mini masterpieces ever since. An ATC is a small artist trading card size 2" x 3" and can be created by using any medium you choose. For me is was a much needed break to take the time from my busy schedule of taking care of my family, working a full-time job, and running a growing business of my own. This tiny piece of art takes little time, but is a huge stress reliever. The little messages that I include are positive messages for myself & others. It gets even better... you can share your art by giving it away to someone special or trading with someone. I found many swap buddies on Instagram. Search #ATC or #artisttradingcard and you will find so many people who might want to swap mini art with you.

4. Solo Art Project - Relax and spend some time doing something just for fun. It's okay if you don't have a large chunk of time, too. I sometimes start a project by first working on the background one night and finishing it up another night. My favorite is mixed media art. You can find inspiration on Instagram or Pinterest. I have many Pinterest boards I use for inspiration as well as some of my own art and design projects. Follow me on Pinterest http://www.pinterest.com/kradke/ if you would like some creative inspiration for yourself.

Related Article: "I can't tell you how big of a hypocrite I feel like writing about self-love. I'm only a few posts into it and I already want to abandon this project altogether because I don't know what the hell I'm doing! That's the fear talking." [...] 5 Ways To Practice Self-Love Part 2 | L I N K » http://bit.ly/1fznoPS

5. Read Art Books - I have found some amazing books on Amazon. I have found them to be very inspirational and a great resource for learning different techniques. I have acquired a pretty large collection over the years, but my favorite is "Taking Flight: Inspiration & Techniques To Give Your Creative Spirit Wings" by Kelly Rae Roberts.

How do you stay creative and practice self-love with art?! We'd love to hear from you in the comments! 

Katie Radke of KR Creative is a graphic designer and website designer located in Nebraska City, Nebraska who works with clients worldwide. For the past 11 years Katie has created graphics and websites that give business owners a competitive edge and the confidence to move their business forward. Find KR Creative on Facebook www.facebook.com/krcreativedesigns or visit her website www.krcreativedesigns.com.

To be notified when new Redefining Self-Love posts are available, sign-up for updates from Wayfaring Wanderer HERE and “LIKE” the Wayfaring Wanderer Facebook page to get connected! Interested in writing a guest post for the Redefining Self-Love Series? Shoot me an email with your ideas on ways to practice self-love at wayfaringwanderer[at]gmail[dot]com!

{ RELATED LINKS }

» 5 Ways To Practice Self-Love (Part 1) & 5 Ways To Practice Self-Love (Part 2)

» Food As Love: 5 Ways to Love Yourself w/ Food (Guest Post)

» Redefining Self-Love w/ Celebrate You Sessions

Redefining Self-Love Series | 5 Ways to Love Yourself with Food | Guest Post from Leah @ Deep Rooted Wellness

My passion for food stems from my own 10-year battle with an eating disorder. As many high school girls and young women experience (and men as well, eating disorders aren't unique to the female gender), food became a major source of anxiety, discomfort, regret, failure, and sickness. And it’s unlike any other addiction in that you can’t just quit cold turkey – you have to learn to manage your addiction. I spent years learning to do just that, but it wasn't until I started to think about food in a more loving way that my attitude and perspective about diet shifted.

Detox Veggies | Photo by Deep Rooted Wellness

In the past, I created strict boundaries surrounding my food choices (i.e. NONE of this and certainly NONE of that – you can fill in the blank with your own restriction). No matter how tightly I tried to hold the reins, I would fail. If Ben & Jerry’s ice cream was on the ‘No List,’ I’d adhere to the rule for a few days, maybe even a week or two and then I’d binge on, yes, an entire pint of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream. And you know how that made me feel? Like a failure. Like a completely incompetent glutton. Like a big fat pig that had zero self-control. Doesn't sound very loving, does it?

So what changed? First and foremost, I started to view food as a way to love and nourish my body, rather than something that needed to be restricted. When I started to think about food as love, then I automatically began eating a healthier diet and in turn, kicked some pretty bad habits and lost over 40 lbs.

I found there to be a couple of extremely important principles in my “food as love” journey that I thought were worth passing on:

1. Before you eat something, ask “Is this the most loving choice for my body?”

We have a way of feeling like we “earned” that huge piece of cheesecake (or whatever your vice may be), but the reality is that we’re “rewarding” ourselves with something that doesn't provide our body with the nourishment that it needs. When we’re not nourished, we don’t feel our best. A better approach is to reward ourselves with foods that make us feel whole and nourished. So next time you sit down to overindulge in an unhealthy food, first ask yourself “is this the most loving choice for my body?” And if it’s not, find something that is.

Gluten Free Donuts | Photo by Deep Rooted Wellness

2. If you just can’t resist the urge to eat junk food, “upgrade” your food choice.

Let’s say that you know your cheesecake isn't going to be the most loving choice for your body, but you just can’t resist. Nothing can stop you from eating it… and that’s okay, but first ask yourself, “is there a better choice that would suffice?” I have this problem with ice cream all the time, so I've started upgrading to a mixture of frozen fruit, avocado, almond milk and maple syrup. I throw everything into a good food processor or blender and I promise, this is SO close to ice cream! It totally fulfills the need for ice cream without that side of guilt and regret - I “upgraded” my choice. Part of the challenge with this one is determining the food characteristics that attract you in the first place – is it the saltiness, creaminess, sweetness, etc.? Figure out which characteristics are driving your desire and then fill that desire with a healthier choice that still has those same characteristics.

Photos courtesy of Deep Rooted Wellness

3. Forgive overindulgences. And hell, you can even enjoy them!

There’s much to be said about the role of stress in digestion. When we’re stressed, we release cortisol that inhibits our bodies from maximizing digestion and nutrient assimilation. So if you’re eating your cheesecake and all you keep thinking is “why I am doing this? I’m not supposed to be eating this,” your cortisol levels are rising and your cheesecake is doing even more damage than had you eaten the damn piece of cake and enjoyed it. So forgive yourself, and move on from the cheesecake incident. It’s not worth fretting over because what's done is done.

4. Make a weekly meal plan.

I can’t stress this enough. Yes, it takes time to put a meal plan together, but once you get in the habit of planning your meals, you’ll save a ton of time and money. Besides, if you have a plan in place, it’s much harder to make poor choices surrounding food. Let’s say it’s Thursday night, you feel like grabbing a cheesy burrito on your way home from work, but you’ve planned your week and you’ve already bought groceries. If you eat out, your groceries will just go bad. So home you go, to prepare a loving, nourishing dinner for you and your family.

Massaged Kale, Lentil & Goat Cheese Salad | Photo by Deep Rooted Wellness | Click image for recipe

5. Eat more whole foods.

Think of your body as a machine that needs good food as fuel. When we eat packaged, processed foods (even many of the all natural, organic ones), we’re putting chemicals in our bodies that don’t provide our “machine” with the right “fuel.” Our cells depend on the chemical breakdown of those “fuels” to build hormones, neurotransmitters and tissues. If you eat the wrong thing, then your body isn't able to manufacture the right product, which can leave us feeling imbalanced, moody, emotional, fatigued, grumpy, or a whole slew of other issues. Not to mention disease and undesirable health outcomes. A healthy whole foods diet includes grains, beans, nuts, seeds, fruits, vegetables and moderate amounts of animal proteins. The more of these foods you incorporate into your diet, the better you’ll feel!

Want to learn more about how to love yourself with food? Sign up for Leah’s 10-Day Detox Teleworkshop starting on April 28th! Leah will guide you through a 17-day program in which you’ll learn first hand how to make loving choices surrounding diet. You can learn more here: http://www.deeprootedwellness.com/events/2014/4/28/spring-detox-teleworkshop

Leah Webb, MPH (Master of Public Health), is a Vermont-based Certified Health Coach, who specializes in helping people feel more energized by making loving food choices, lose weight, balance emotions, and relieve chronic inflammation and pain. "Like" Deep Rooted Wellness on Facebook and sign-up for FREE whole foods recipes and other updates so you can connect w/ Leah!

To be notified when new Redefining Self-Love posts are available, sign-up for updates from Wayfaring Wanderer HERE and “LIKE” the Wayfaring Wanderer Facebook page to get connected!